Dentist Jokes, Dental Humor, Dental quotes

Wheaton family dental practice

Dental jokes and quotes found here!

Dentist jokes are often told to us dentists. From time to time a patient tells me or emails me a dental joke they really like so I thought I would put together a post to share them.  

British man negotiates cost of tooth extraction (Very funny!)

Just at the moment when the dentist was leaning over towards his patient to start on her teeth, he was startled & said:
“Excuse me, Miss, but those are my testicles that you are holding.”
“”I know,” she answered sweetly.

“Let us be very careful not to hurt each other ……. OK?”

Q: What does the dentist of the year get?
A: A little plaque. 

 The female dentist pulls out a numbing needle to give the man a shot of Novocain.

“No way! No needles. I hate needles” the patient said..

The dentist starts to hook up the nitrous oxide and the man objects.  “I can’t do the gas thing. The thought of having the gas mask on, suffocates me!”  The dentist then asks the patient if he has any objection to taking a pill.  “No objection,” the patient says. “‘I’m fine with pills.”  The dentist then returns and says, “Here’s a Viagra.” The patient says, “Wow! I didn’t know Viagra worked as a pain killer!” “It doesn’t” said the dentist, “but it’s going to give you something to hold on to when I pull your tooth…..”
Golf And Dentures

A couple of old guys were golfing when one mentioned that he was going
to go to Dr. Steinberg for a new set of dentures in the morning.

His elderly buddy remarked that he, too, had gone to the very same
dentist two years before.

“Is that so?” asked the first old guy. “Did he do a good job?”

The second oldster replied, “Well, I was on the golf course yesterday
when a guy on the next fairway hooked a shot. The ball must have been
going at least 180 mph when it slammed me right in the balls .”

The first old guy was confused and asked, “What the hell does that
have to do with your dentures?”

“It was the first time in two years my teeth didn’t hurt.”

 

Impractical Jokers video

Quotes about or involving the dentist

“That’s the Kind of Porsche that Dentists Drive” Steve Jobs

“Medicine is a science of uncertainty and an art of probability.” “A physician who treats himself has a fool for a patient”  William Osler